It’s funny to me that people are making such a big deal about Nicholas’ birth. I mean, I know, I was at work on Monday morning and that he was born within two hours after I left. I do think it is awesome that I caught him as he came out. The feeling of putting my hands down there and feeling that this baby was still in the sac also was really cool. With Liam, I didn’t want to feel, with Nicholas, I knew that I need to keep my hand down there to control my pushing so that I didn’t tear too badly. I did tear, but that part didn’t hurt. I was actually surprised that I did.
It was cool how my brain was working as he was crowning. I was telling myself to slow down. I had read enough birth stories to know that I needed to try and ease him out. My body had other ideas though. I’m glad I was able to go with it though. Feeling his head slip out, with the sac still around was a very cool feeling. Seconds later, his whole body slipped out into my hands. I looked down at his face and saw that he was completely surrounded by the sac. I took my right hand and brushed it downwards over his face. Then I realized I wanted to know if he was a boy or a girl. I lifted him up with my left hand and saw he was a boy. Then I continued on removing the sac from his face and pulled it from his body. His umblical cord was plenty long and was actually wrapped around his lower body.
Later on Monday, my husband thought it was crazy that in the moment of trying to see if Nicholas was going to breath, that I checked to see if he was a boy or a girl. At that moment, he said he could have cared less. He just wanted to know that he was breathing. Nicholas was pretty quiet when he was born. He was pinky-blue in color and he just sat there, not limp, just there. I blew gently into his face while rubbing his body gently. He made a few cries. The thoughts in my head were, I didn’t want to be one of the home birth stories that you hear about that the birth goes great and then they can’t get the baby breathing well enough. Another part of my brain was telling me that you can see his chest rising and falling and that he was okay.
I asked my husband afterward why he was so calm. He said that in the moment, he had placed his faith in God’s hands and that he knew we were going to be taken care of. I really expected his face to be more panicky. I think that God was there keeping Damon so relaxed and calm. I’m so appreciative that Damon was there. I hated the moments when Damon had to leave the room to tend to either Liam or the other birthing matters when I was in labor. I didn’t want to be by myself. Damon was there every moment when I absolutely needed him. I will have to remember his strengths as well as mine in the future.
I felt bad for my midwife, Carolyn, when she began to do my stitches. She was truly apologetic for missing the birth. Very few people, do I really believe when they say that they are sorry, but her face said it all. It wasn’t her fault, I did not realize how fast things were progressing. I figured the birth would last 4-6 hours. In hindsight, I guess it was going on for a while. I had had pressure waves throughout the night, but I was listening to my Hypnobabies tracks throughout the night and I thought that I had imagined some of them. Plus Hypnobabies does such a good job of reminding you that you are just feeling pressure, not pain.
Well, I’ll type more about the birth later, baby is hungry and my milk came in last night. I must nurse. I’m surprised at how fast the milk has come in too. I guess my body just likes doing things quickly this time.